Recap, Page Three: Hijinks in the Heartland-- Self-Immolating farmers, Moonshine, Giant Mutated Cabbages, jingal teams, Anarchists, Sadistic Prussians, and Genetically Altered Cows.  In other words, all in a day's work.

The front runners now were off the bridge, and the Giant Spiky Thing (piloted by Doktor Eevil-- the great grandfather of Austin Power's nemesis) was the last L Class to clear it.  Speaking of which, it was quite the model, the contribution of Al "Rivets and Steam" Halden.  Al's an absolute madman of a modeler, and he does VSF quite well:


Spikey in the Wabash, 1

Side view:

Spikey in the Wabash, 2

Where did you get those coolio vehicle drivers, Al?

Unfortunately, the Big Spikey thing did not get up to speed during the race, turning over several times.  The curse of a L-Class Monowheel... all the mass and momentum of a L-Class, and the turning capability of a unicycle!

The pack moved past the lumberyard, and not a one of them activated the Disturbed War Vet with a Chainsaw.  Shucks.  Another cinematic moment wasted!

Moving on to the first Farm Side Structure, Farmer Bill's Barn, triggered an unfortunate run in with Ethan , the depressed Amish Farmer who thinks these fancy contraptions will spell the end of a way of life, and he's not willing to be peaceful about it!  Ethan lights a keg of TNT, with predictable results (for Ethan):

Ethan Makes his Personal Statement

Fortunately for Dowd, he had great luck and just spun around when the blast went off, and Ali Assassin experienced some Light Wounds.  Unfortunately for everyone else, Ethan had now put a huge obstacle right in a place where nobody could avoid it-- so all Small and Medium conveyances going over the blast area had to take a Balance Check.

A door or so down, Farmer Bob himself was there, with the products of his still.  Only O'Roarke took advantage of the "instant energy points" that the Farmer's poteen provided him.  Hey, that's a stretch for O'Roarke, isn't it?

The race started to stretch out a bit:

Mid-Race, Looking down the table

With everyone off the bridge and spread out to take advantage of the terrain and such, we heave a sigh of relief.  LITTLE DID WE KNOW OF THE HORRORS THAT WERE TO AWAIT US JUST  A LITTLE BIT UP THE ROAD!!!!

NEXT:Pa! Pa! There's Evil Proosians in the Cabbage Patch!